Bibidibopidiboo

(prepare yourselves...this is a long one) Sometimes life runs so outta control that just for a second you wish that you could borrow that magic wand from the Fairy GodMother and say those magic words...Bibidibobidiboo...then I start to think of all that I would miss in those few seconds. What if I hadn't used the wand, how would this or that situation turned out? For the better or for the worse? I guess that for right now, I will just sit back and watch Cinderella use the wand and enjoy the "betters" and "worst" that happen here and there. Thankfully more "betters" than the other. While driving somewhere the other day, cruising along with the windows down and the music blaring, a song came on that I'd heard before, but not really thought about...it's by Trace Adkins and it's titled, "You're Gonna Miss This". Here are the lyrics in case you're not familiar with it:

She was staring out the window of their SUV
Complaning, saying "I can't wait to turn 18"
She said "I'll make my own money, and I'll make my own rules"
Mamma put the car in park out there in front of the school
Then she kissed her head and said "I was just like you"

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Before she knows it she's a brand new bride
In a one-bedroom apartment, and her daddy stops by
He tells her "It's a nice place"
She says "It'll do for now"
Starts talking about babies and buying a house
Daddy shakes his head and says "Baby, just slow down"

Cause you're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
And she keeps apologizin'
He says "They don't bother me. 
I've got 2 babies of my own. 
One's 36, one's 23.
Huh, it's hard to believe, but...

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this"

Of course it was the chorus that kept repeating itself in my head. I do find myself at times, more lately than usual, looking back and wishing that life would just slow down. That we could savour our cherished moments just a moment longer. Here's a few things that I was thinking I wish hadn't gone by so fast...

• High School-yes, even though I was the poodle with big glasses, I wish that I had known to nurture my friendships more and not take them so for-granted. I wish that I had paid attention more in classes. All classes for that matter! Mostly Business, as a couple years ago, our Business teacher died of cancer and won't make it to our class reunion. Sad. 
• Family-though it was cold, and though it was early, I wish that I had gotten my lazy butt outta bed and gone out and fed cows, moved cows, branded cows, or bailed hay. Those are moments that I could have built more memories with family...I am SO thankful for the memories that I do have. I wish that I had spent more time with Dan and Katie in Latvia. I really didn't think that it'd be 8 years later, and I wouldn't have returned to visit. This list could go on and on....
• College - if you went to college with me and you are reading this, you are going to laugh...I wish that I would have stayed up later. Though a late night owl now, I wasn't then, hitting the bed as early sometimes as 7:30! What was I thinking???? Thanks to those who often tried to keep me out past that bedtime, and I apologize and ask for forgiveness to those whose heads I bit off if you weren't being quiet enough..sorry
• Any kids that I've taught/played with/crossed paths with...I wish that I'd listened to you more when you were trying to tell me something. I wish that I'd asked more questions instead of doing all the talking. I wish that I'd savored your little "funny" moments more, tickled more, laughed more, played more and had you sit in time-outs less. 
• And last that I'm going to write about, but not last on my list...love. I wish that I hadn't put myself out there in loving the opposite sex so many times just to come back a little more broken each time. I've been thinking about that phrase, "Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all"... In what context was this written? Love as in relationship love with the opposite sex? Cause I have "loved". I have poured out love to family, friends and kids. I feel as if I could die tomorrow knowing that I have loved. Some I have lost. Some friendships I have poured love into are no more. Some kids I have poured love into don't have a clue who I am when I run up to them and say "Hi!" And sometimes that feels like a lost. So I do agree with that statement in that context. I don't think that I agree with it in the LOVE (passion, desire, attraction to the opposite sex) sense. Why would you want to go through the rest of your life trying to mend and mend and mend a broken heart? Yeah, you "get over it" with time, but you never really "get over it", know what I mean? It still lingers in the heart. A friend of mine told me that 6 months is long enough. Long enough to sulk, long enough to cry, long enough to hear that song and fall apart, like your chest is being ripped from you with a knife, and you can't breathe, and you feel like you're going to throw up. 6 months. Is that really long enough? Yes she said. Have a "Goodbye ________" party! Make it an occasion! Burn pictures! Burn memories! This sounds harsh! I don't know if I'm into that whole idea, but I am into "getting over it". Shoving it into the backest, deepest part of my mind and heart so that when I do hear that song or see that picture, I don't become sick. I'm thinking, "Better to not have loved than to mend a broken heart."

Ok, off of that heavy subject! I'm wanting to close up this blog...I have to work tomorrow. Yes, it is Sat, and no, it's not babysitting. I decided that I'm not "busy" enough, so I took a Sat. job! It's at this CUTE baby/kids boutique in Northbrook. Yes, I put an alcoholic in a liquor store! One of these Sats. I'll bring home a paycheck! Check out the website if you get time...www.peek-a-boutique.com. 

Lilli and Isabella are growing, it's incredible. Bella is crawling and just our little ball of constant joy, I'm not kidding! Smiles and laughs 24-7. Lilli is GREAT at being a big sister from running and getting diapers to feeding her while I make our lunch. She's the best! I'll download some pics of them soon! Paxton Bailey will also be downloaded soon. I did his 1 month and they turned out great! For now, I'm off to catch some zzzzz's-Sweet Dreams!